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I've never had trouble not gluing the gasket. I'd recommend not gluing it at first, if it gives you any trouble - then go ahead and secure it down. As you're about to discover, a glued gasket is a real PITA to remove!
Do you have directional inlets (eyeballs) for the returns? If so, try using 1/4" eyeballs on the strong returns and 1" on the weaker ones. It sounds like they were plumbed in series, rather than parallel so the returns first in line get more pressure than the further ones so playing with the size of the inlet will create backpressure and ~ equalize the flow.
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