Carl,
I agree with you about satellite/sub setup, even though I do have the Yamaha/Infinity satellite setup on my home theater, I rarely listen to music exclusively, unless watching a concert on rave hd tv or on hdnet tv. My Yamaha reciever came with a microphone that you put in the middle of the room and it more or less sets itself up. When I did this it set the speakers like you describe with very little bass/subwoofer. I guess sound is subjective, and I am no audiophile by any means, and half deaf from 20 years in an aluminum extrusion factory (my line has a loud saw in it) I kinda run my subwoofer a little "hotter" than the yamaha had it set....OK,OK, I like BASS!! So I do let it thump.
I play drums at my church and we have 15" Mackie powered sub sitting about 2 feet away from me, and our sound guy is not afraid to use it, along with our bass guitar player on the other side of me with a 15" Peavey black widow so I guess I am just used to alot of bass.